satire: The Ever-Growing Height of Ravana

 

These days, we’re living in what I call ‘The Great Age of Pride’ Everything — big or small, sensible or silly — is now a matter of national pride. If someone so much as ties their shoelaces with style, there’s a chance it’ll make it to the evening news: “We did it! Be proud!”

 

Honestly, I think it’s time we amend our Constitution and add a new fundamental duty - Every Indian shall be proud all the time, about anything and everything. And if someone dares ask, “But what exactly are we proud of?” we can confidently reply: “Of everything, of course! Our world records, our tallest statues, our loudest firecrackers, our longest moustaches — you name it, we’ve got it!”

 

Take last Diwali, for instance — we lit up millions of lamps to make a world record. And now, this Dussehra, in Kota, we’ve gone even further — we built and burned a 221 feet tall effigy of Ravan! Only ₹44 lakh! A small price for global domination, right? After all, has any other country ever burned a taller villain? Didn’t think so. Truly, Vishwaguru vibes.

 

But here’s what’s been bugging me — why is Ravan’s height increasing every single year? We’re told effigy is the symbol of evil. Logically, evil should shrink every year as goodness grows, right? Instead, it seems we’ve been feeding him steroids! We build him taller, decorate him with grandeur and burn him brighter — and then clap proudly as if we’ve conquered the sin itself.

 

Let’s be honest — if anyone’s height should’ve been growing, it’s Lord Rama’s, not Ravana’s. But alas! Ram Leela mirrors society. These days, Leela includes everything from Surpanakha’s cabaret to Ravana’s court full of gyrating dancing girls. And who’s watching all this? The modern audience — munching popcorn, taking selfies, and jubilantly shouting, “Totally worth the ticket price!”

 

We’re obsessed with being the biggest, tallest, longest, oldest and loudest in the world. We take pride in changing a city’s name and Railway station’s name to something longer — instant greatness! Build the world’s tallest statue — instant inspiration! Maybe, someday, if we keep at it, your statue too will stand tall next to them. Why not? After all, greatness these days is as easy as applying for a Guinness World Record — or at least the Asian Book of Records.

 

We already hold proud titles like World’s Longest Nails and Longest Moustache. And now, thanks to the 221-foot Ravana, we’ve added ‘Tallest Evil Ever Constructed’ Rama, on the other hand, is shrinking every year.

 

Of course, the philosophers might say, even if Rama is smaller in size, his virtue outweighs all evil. But who cares about philosophy when you’ve got drone shots and record certificates?

 

Crowd these days don’t come to see Rama’s victory — they come to see how gigantic Ravana has become. Children, elders, even politicians — everyone’s eyes are glued to the fiery villain. Just like in real life, Ravana steals the spotlight while Ram waits quietly in the background. We burn him every year — yet he refuses to die. Maybe that’s because he’s no longer an effigy of bamboo, paper and cloth — he’s living quite comfortably inside all of us and feeding him day in day out.

He’s in our greed, our ego, our obsession with fame and display. Every year, we build him taller, and he laughs louder. You can burn him a thousand times — it doesn’t matter. He’s immortal. Eternal! He was here yesterday, he’s here today, and trust me, he’ll be around tomorrow, taller than ever.  

So, dear citizens of the Proud Republic, ask yourself honestly: Who’s the real role model of our generation — Rama, the humble prince or Ravana the opulent influencer?

 

Because, my friends, whether you like it or not —Ravana is still growing not just in dimension —but right inside our DNA.