satire: Running over Girlfriend’s Father

 

 

When a father caught his darling daughter sitting cozily in a car with her boyfriend, his blood boiled faster than boiling milk. He stormed in, stopped the car, and thrashed the young couple blue and black. He didn’t just hit them — he humiliated them publicly. 

 

The poor lover boy tried to stay calm at first. After all, this was his future father-in-law. One must show respect — the man who might someday bless your marriage and fund your honeymoon. But alas, every saint has his breaking point. When the slaps turned into blows, his patience evaporated. In that explosive moment, the young Romeo of 2025 did something only a true fool in love could do — he started his car and ran over his future father-in-law.

 

Now, let’s not get dramatic — the old man didn’t die, but he did take a few unplanned somersaults by the impact of four-wheeler before landing on all fours, unconscious. The onlookers counted like in a boxing match — One! Two! Three! — but the old man wasn’t getting up. Seeing the chaos he’d created, the boyfriend did what any smart man would do — he drove straight to the police station.

 

And believe it or not, this might have been his most romantic move yet. You see, love has a way of making even the dumbest actions poetic. At the police station he could now rehearse his confession:

"I didn’t mean to hurt Papa ji! It was all in a moment of rage. The car and I both lost control. Maybe the car felt insulted too — after all, it’s my car; how long could it watch its owner being humiliated in full public view”

 

And of course, the girlfriend would melt like butter on a hot paratha. She’d already forgiven him busy in nursing her father and the whole family would eventually go back to live happily ever after— perhaps with Dad learning a few defensive skills while on road.

 

But let’s imagine, for one terrifying second, that this lover wasn’t driving a car. Suppose he were in the army — behind the wheel of a tank. Would he have fired a shell at his future father-in-law’s house? If he were in the Air Force, would he have dropped a bomb in the backyard? The mind boggles.

 

This is not romance, my friends. This is a bad example of madness on wheels and a perilous precedent for fathers of daughters. Love is supposed to make you protective, poetic, even poorer, certainly not homicidal. If you claim to love someone more than your own life, you can’t go around running over her father.

 

Still, one can’t help but chuckle thinking of the future: someday, when this couple gets married, how will they tell their children this story? ‘Beta, your Dadu once hit me, so I ran him over with my car. And that’s how your mother and I knew — we were made for each other’

Ah, romance in the age of horsepower. If this is love, may God save the pedestrian fathers.